December 2009
textsfromlastnight:
(415): Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There’s blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
textsfromlastnight:
(509): im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
textsfromlastnight:
(732): i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
textsfromlastnight:
(724): Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren’t vases
textsfromlastnight:
(650): Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
textsfromlastnight:
(816): yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn’t do that last night. big mistake
brittanyrey:
“you ain’t the only one with a
gun, bitch”…and then I came :)
great line
